Decisions, Decisions…

I understand the concept of working a job that isn’t fulfilling. As a matter of fact, I don’t know enough people who absolutely love their job. I think when it comes to “working”, you’re lucky if you find a career that makes you happy and pays the bills. But, it’s not always easy to land that…so I’m content with a job that pays the bills and doesn’t take away from the things in life that are fulfilling to me.

With that being said, me thinks it’s time to move around. My schedule is shitty and doesn’t allow me to be as active in UK as I should be. I took this job 6 months ago believing that the compromise would be the fact that A.) We get benefits after 3 months and vacation after 6 months and B.) By 6 months we’d have more agents…giving us the opportunity to get better schedules (as we’d have seniority over new employees) but that couldn’t be further from the truth. We started out with 11 people on our team. Before we made it to the floor, we were down to 10.  Since then, we’ve lost 4 people (Includin’ Ace Boon Coon Mika and Booshie-Ass Delicia, lol!) So there are 6 agents. 2 of the 6 are team leads, so we can’t trade schedules with them. SO. That leaves us with 4 agents who can trade shifts amongst themselves. The 2 with the better schedules never wanna change shifts, and the one with the slightly less shitty shift can’t really trade cause she has to give her dog medicine on a strict schedule. This means I’m only ever off on Wednesdays and Sundays. It means if we have a fashion show or event on Thursday, Friday, or Saturday…I’m stuck at work til 11pm, and can’t go. It means that even though my vacation and sick pay kicks in next week, I’ll never really be approved to take it cause we’re so short staffed. In theory, that means I don’t get to work “Kixpo” next weekend…and I don’t get to go to Vegas next month for the company trip to the Magic convention. With all that said…I’m out like a lightbulb unless magically the “Fix shit” Fairy pays this place a visit.

O…K, B!

As far as evil robots go…he’s not one. I never…ever sit and try to “figure him out”. Cause while I’m sure that would be a challenge, the act of not doing so is a challenge in itself  as well.   I’m pretty much coasting off of a few select thoughts…

1.) It is so good. (Yes, like the yogurt commercial)
2.) I have an eye contact complex, and there have been very few people in my life that I’ve been able to make natural eye contact with. Not sayin he’s special or anything, but, I feel like somewhere on his sclera there’s a grafitti tagging that reads, “Ivy was here” Lol.
3.) Don’t get this confused with me being mushy, but, I’d probably listen to him fart the national anthem if he asked. I put up with a lotta bizarre gestures, and that really wouldn’t seem too far-fetched anymore.
4.) The last bite of cheesecake tastes best when it’s someone elses. Even if you didn’t want any. Lol…
5.) To call him a best friend seems like it would cheapen it. (I stole that concept from Kenny…who in a non-cheap way is one of my best friends. Hmm!)…but none of my best friends could get away with licking the side of my face and have me walk around smellin like a sneeze. LOL…
6.)  His “concern” reminds me that even with all my super powers, I’m not fully invincible, and I really should be careful. “You don’t like me walkin’ in the sun cause it’s hot…or unda da moon cause there’s weirdos at night…so when can I walk? And under which planet/star?” Lol…

Anyway…I don’t like the guy.

My off day

So…yesterday was my off day…went over KB’s and lounged around…takin’ cat naps and what-not…watched a shit-load of the Boondocks…lol.

Here are some recent observations…

1.) It doesn’t have to smell like laundry, cologne, soap, etc…but just a man’s scent in general (not just any man of course, lol) is this crazy mix of “turn on, comfort and safety.”

2.) We write hard…talk soft…act softer.

3.) I’m more giving than I’d like to admit.

4.) Secret turn on…whispering ANYTHING in my ear. “I really enjoy cheeseburgers”…”Did you remember to turn off the iron?”…”Can you help me do laundry on Saturday?” Yes, ANYTHING. Lol…it can get downright silly at times…what’s wrong with me???

Uhhh’s, so I get a call from Biggers, and I’m thinkin it’s gonna be on some hardcore serious-business isht…(I kinda cringed before I answered cause I was sooooo comfortable and at ease). But…he was calling to tell me my skate deck is featured on the LupEnd Blog. I’d say it was the highlight of my day…but…my whole day was kind of a highlight cause I spent it with one of my favorite people on a futon, eatin’ chips, drinkin’ happy hour jumbo fountain drinks and watchin’ cartoons. I know you’re like “Wtf?” Lol, don’t take much to make me happy. But I digress…I was totally stoked that they decided to post it…it’s kind of a big deal cause everyone knows I love all things Fiasco. 

What elsers? This is the third day in a row I’ve been in contact with Jay (AKA Mr. Abs to you Shannon, lol) and I’m kinda like, “Niiiiice…ooops…huh?” It’s just small talk, and wouldn’t be a big deal if we’d always been in touch. I dunno…I think about him and feel shy. *Hmm*

Heh. No matter. Really just stopped by to say I’m thankful for my lazy day in yesterday. Looking forward to the next.

Shhh…I stealz deh babeh pick chuhs.

Baby Jayliciah

Simply Beautiful

Jay and his newest little one

Lol, he just gon’ hafta be mad at me for sharing these. (Stole em from his facebook, lol) Speaking of, he called today as I was getting ready for work. All’s well for him, and like I said before, I couldn’t be happier. These were my fave pics from the album cause of the way he’s looking at her. *Cheesy grin* I love it!

Her name is Jayliciah Marie, and I’m here to tell you right now, had it been me, and she haaaaaad to have his name in there somewhere, it would have been “Jaela” (You heard me, not Jayla like he’d try to do) Lol, again, all kinds of congrats cause she’s freakin a. dor. able.

Ciao Babeh!

Lupe Fiasco inspired skate deck.

Okay, so for those of you that DON’T know, I’ve been in Love with Lu prolly since before he was featurin’ on Tha Rayne’s songs (btw, though nobody knows who they are…I loved them…Yummy Bingham is the truth!) Anyways…not gonna gush on him, cause if you love Hip Hop, Rock, Pop, Fashion or any nerdy shit, you can pick up what he’s puttin’ down. (Haha…I stole that from Prince Vince Blade Brown…lol) Anyway…I’d call Lupe a genius, but…it’s takin him entirely too long to ask for my hand in marriage. Lu…whatchu waitin’ on?!

: ) Enter the first official “Chic” deck from Unkommon Kolor…

I love Lupe Fiasco!Details, Details...

Details, Details...

My first custom deck…engraved with a woodburner, stained, and handpainted by my alter ego (Pretty Flaca DiBaca). My tribute to the man of my dreams and one one of the songs that put him on the rest of the word’s radar, “Kick Push”.

“…Now let me make one thing clear, I don’t need to ride yours, I got mine right here…”

A quote I live by : ). You can check this and other Fly Shit out at Unkommon Kolor.

Peace…F&F^

: ) !!!

So…though I completely winged this weekend, I did it well. Friday…open mic poetry…I had a BLAST. Performed twice (I did “Love May King” and “Other Women, Other Woman“) got some great feedback…I really just have to work on my nerves. Either way…GREAT night. I heard 3 of THE most talented R&B Soul artists live and under one roof. Quentin Dyer Moore, John Bailey and Archie Robinson. OMG. Okay, Yeah, Q is my friend…but dude is TALENTED. He recently released an album, and if I can figure out how to link to all his stuff, I’ll do so later. Archie and John were COMPLETE surprises…I had never met either of them, and while I had heard of John, I’d never heard him live. Each of them performed individually…KILLED IT. Then they came back up for a collabo…I’m here to tell you right now…there was nothing more beautiful than three SEXY, TALENTED, CHOCOLATE LOCAL artists performing…the only way I can explain the music they made (keep in mind it was pretty much all improvised!!!) is to say that I was starving and didn’t even know it! Then their voices fed me. It was like something was poured over me…I was definitely in a trance. Whatever voo-doo they did…it’s rekindled my love for the Dallas music scene.  Again, I’ll try to come back and link to these artists I was so blessed to meet and perform amongst…but I will say, there’s no youtube vid or online snippet that will be able to give you an idea of how I felt in their presence…there’s nothing like being right there to hear the richness of their voices, and the music…omg. Alright, I’m done…sort of…

Speaking of Good local music…(soon to be all over the world music) The Sore Losers had a GREAT show Saturday night…check out the pics here : ) *goofy grin* That King Blue guy is rather handsome…Vince did his thing…even with those retched tube socks. Lol, so…shot out to KB, Prince Vince, Fizzy Dino Pop, Damaged Good$ and Steven “Wreckamic” Mullin for bein’ the DOPEST Storm Trooper to ever grace the stage. (Check the pics…he was doin the Stanky Legg…need I say more?!)

*Shrugs* All in all…it was a good night…I got to be around some of my favorite people…hear some of my favorite music, and probably add to some of my favorite memories.

I’ll leave with a few things I observed…

1.) There’s something utterly magical about sexy panties…they scream, “Touch me…” without even being seen. 

2.) My little purple dress (or any simple dress I throw on for that matter) can whoop your little black dress’s ass!!!

3.) Eyes…arms…get lost in em.

Ciao!

Chase

So, I’ve lived in my North Dallas neighborhood for nearly 3 years. Not much has changed accept there’s more cops, less violence, and I get slightly less attention than I did when I was new. I say less, because when I first moved out here, I was TERRIFIED to leave the house during the day. I’d get so much unwanted attention it was scary. Guys following me for blocks, or tryin to trap me with their vehicle in a dead end, etc. It got to the point where I’d only walk down the street after 11pm. Cause at night, in my pajamas, it’s harder to see what I look like. People are less likely to bother me cause I could be a crack-head, a hooker, a guy… Whatever. Well, out of all the guy’s cars that slowed down over the years, there’s one guy that I was always polite (though short) with. In all of our run-ins, He’s never honked at me (my pet peeve). He always rides alongside me, trying to convince me that “today’s the day…” Lol. He’s parked and walked with me a few times, and while I admired his “I’m tryin to come correct” approach, it still didn’t get him far. His name is Chase, and he strikes me as a soft-spoken, square Ryan Leslie. Yesterday, he saw me at the shopping center near my apts. He quickly parked his Hummer, and followed me into where else? The beauty supply store. Lol, he dared to go where no straight man dares to gooooo…lol. I couldn’t find what I wanted, so we went next door to another store where I did. (Cleaning gloves) he then grabbed my hand (bold, right?!) And for some reason I spared his life (anybody knows that I’m quick to pull out the mace and/or a blade). He opened up the passenger side of his truck and gave me a ride back home (2 min away). We talked, and after nearly 3 years of politely turning him down, I gave him my number. Not cause I wanna date anyone…hell, after this week, I’m so burnt out on “liking” someone, I don’t know when I’ll come back down off the shelf. It’s not like getting back up on the horse…it’s more like climbing onto a talllll giraffe…oh well. I’ve got a 3 day weekend, and my prior plans are ruined so…
But I digress. I gave him my number “because”. And because had I not, I feel like Karma woulda sent another asshole along to teach me a lesson. Heh…hope this week ends well. I really wish Ant coulda came to open mic last night. *fighting a smile* I remember him being quite the poet.

Happy for him!!!

Alright. So. I said I had somethin to say about Jay. Hopefully my blog is tucked away far enough for him to never find this one, lol. I love him to death, and wish him only the best…cause even though our past is troubled, he’s an amazing person and I’m blessed to have known him. With that said…

He'd kick my ass if he knew I referenced this pic.

 

First off, backstory…I almost quit my job, moved half-way across the world to have a lil girl with him. Lol, blunt, but we were on a mission back in the day, lmao. Here’s the summary:

I met him at work one day…didn’t take him serious…at all. He was gooooode looking, and played basketball…really well. So those were the red lights for me, lmao. Dude’s like that are either hoes, or they’re chased by a million of em. He gave me HIS number, and I dunno what I did with it…(well I knooow what I did with it, but I don’t want to say it here, lol.)

2 months later, I run into his homeboy…who was like, “You know, he looked for you at all his home games…looked out in the crowd, and you neva’ came…” Had me feelin’ all crunchy like the wicked witch of the East…and he calls Jay up right then and there to tell him he ran into me. Few days later, he “stopped by” Ahem. By stopped by, I mean he drove prolly 45 min to an hr to see me. Nothing sexual…we watched his basketball footage (He’s incredible) and just “caught up” since we never spoke after the day I met him. After a while, we started talking, his ex and mother of his children caused some static, makin’ threats about him not being able to see his boys…so I walked away. I didn’t wanna have any part in a man not being able to see his kids…especially one who is a devoted father like he is. He told me to reconsider, and that his ex had backed down…I still didn’t. We ended on bad terms…and didn’t speak or see each other for 2 years.

Ahem. But when we did, we hit the ground running…I was immediately on a plane to Atlanta to reunite with the man of my dreams…lol. There’s no need to go into detail…but I flew back to Texas glowing. I was looking forward to packing up my life, having a big belly, swollen feet, and buying pink stuff. This is the blog about that very day I headed home to say goodbye to Texas.

Anyway…I ended up not having his baby. He ended up having custody battles with the ex, it put extra stress on us, and we didn’t make it. By the time he moved back to Texas, there was nothing to salvage…I loved him, but I didn’t think we could make it work. I didn’t wanna risk getting caught up or hurt…and I had met Ant (insert dreamy music ya’ll, lol). The last time I saw Jay was last July. Won’t go into details, cause it was one of the saddest nights of my life. All I’ll say is that he promised up and down that in the time we were together and in the last 8 months, he hadn’t been with another woman. (I didn’t believe him). He wanted us to get back together, and for me to leave Ant alone. I wouldn’t…so he left. A month later, he posts pics up of his new (old gf) referring to her as his future baby mama. I got a good laugh outta that…cause had I left Ant (And we all know that’s not scientifically possible, lol) that woulda been me. Or it woulda been both of us! Lmao…I spoke to him back in January, and he tells me they were getting married, and he was expecting a baby in June. Then a month later he tells me she lost the baby. He said she was 6 months pregnant. (Yeah, do the math…count the lies.) But then…last week…She had the baby!!! I don’t even care about our past, or the lies…It’s a little girl!!! And she’s BEAUTIFUL…even fresh outta the womb!!!(You know I don’t fuck with babies til they’ve had the slime offa them for at least 3 weeks…lol!!! Most babies come out lookin like gargoyles and I don’t play that shit…but, she’s gorgeous. I don’t even care he was trife as hell…I’m glad he finally got the little girl we wanted…and looking at his track record, it’s for the best that I wasn’t the one to give it to him. But I’m happy. Genuinely happy…and hope he continues to be blessed with his new family, and his basketball franchise he just bought. *Chuckles* I’m an awesome ex. I guess I didn’t have to type all this out to just say that whenever I read Shannon’s blogs about the little girl she didn’t get to have…I think about ‘07. We’ll have our own with real Prince Charmings, lol, someday, I’m certain of it.

p.s. Shannon if you’re reading, hover your mouse over your name. LOL

Toodles!!!

Google Me, Baby!

Lol…so I was havin’ this “I’m hungry but too on edge to eat, What if I really doooo have the diabeetus, I miss KB, prolly should call my Madre and touch bases, Everyone buy a shirt, no I’m not crying!!! (But I really am)” Day, and I thought I’d just curl up and dieeeee!!! LOL vvvvvthat’s how I looked!!!

Punky and Breezy

Last night my Ant Bite texted me…lol, *crowd goes aww* I hope things are looking up for him.

*Pause!!!* While we’re on ex’s, REMIND ME TO TELL YOU BOUT JAY. Omg…

Okay. So today…I see Leslie and just wanna cry in her lap. But…I had a million things to do at my desk, so I just kept leanin back to keep the tears in. Even though it’s Mika’s day off, I was bummed not havin’ her here cause I know she’s never comin’ backkkkk….:( Damn son…

As far as Mr. Feet-Sweeper-Offer, in search of peace, I said my piece…and we’ll see what happens.

But so yeah…I googled myself at my desk. I’m not vain…but I do it every few weeks or so. (It’s fun because I’m like the only “Krisaela” in the world…there’s another, but I think it’s a dude in the Phillipines…) Anyway…I got the normal stuff (Blogs, Unkommon Kolor, Poetry, Track Meet results from way back when…but then…I clicked this…and it Made. My. Day. LOL…it’s like, 2 years old…but the compliments made me all warm and fuzzy inside. I never read them til today. I remember that shoot with my bestie, but not the comments on the pic. Hell, I didn’t think much of the fact that I was in the pic…I was quicker to brag on HIS skills…cause he’s freakin amazing. *Sighs* I see him enough, but I miss him. Like, I miss him 2 years ago. Sip on that…

A whole bunch of what the theeee f***.

Lol, today sucked balls!!! I’ve been all dehydrated and recovering from last night’s black out…lmao, I know I had to have been lookin like a bobbly ass crackhead the way I was shivering…

It’s amazing. I hate the “C” word as much as any guy…but I love myself too much to go far into an unhealthy situation. I don’t do things that I know for a fact I’ll regret when it’s all said and done. No, I’ll never ask for a title. I don’t think anyone should ever have to…nor do I think that it’s what makes things “work”. More important to me than any word or term is a common understanding. That’s it…so yeah, I beat myself up about it today, wondering what I did or said wrong, but really…I was still makin’ excuses. When it comes down to it, I’m the wicked witch of the west cause I asked for clarity. I’m an idiot for allowing the convo to take place in writing, and I’m annoyed I didn’t listen to Ike.

Anyways. Woke up feeling physically, mentally and emotionally dead. Go to work…clock movin’ all slow and isht…Kathy gon’ ask me, “Where’s MY man Kris? How was his show on Friday? Tell him I’m soooo sorry I couldn’t make it…” I almost said, “He’s as much mine as he’ll ever be yours…” But I didn’t wanna be left open for questions, comments…suggestions. I was on edge the whole time, and as soon as I start feelin’ well enough to eat…My ace boon coon got fired on her lunch break!!! (WTF?!?!) So then I’m sittin’ at my desk, scared to death cause my lunch break was comin in 30 min. When I tell you I didn’t wanna go to lunch cause I was scared my desk would be cleaned off…ooooooh weeeeeee!!! Not because I just LOVE my job…I mean, it’s cool, and it’s nice to feel secure…but for the simple fact that I’ve NEVER been fired from anywhere…and the thought of them takin’ me to the back while someone cleaned out my desk was absolutely terrifying!!! I watched them tear through Mika’s desk behind me…they reminded me of a pack of wolves or lions, coming in for a kill. Dang homie…that shit was so foul. What’s the point of firing people in the middle of their shift??? You knew you was gon fire her a week ago…what the fuck is up with that?

Wooomuthafuckinsah.

We gon’ get it together…I’m hittin’ the ground runnin’.

Adi’s and Os’s…
-Kris. :-[